to continue

from the musings of the other day..

Basically, me and two friends have started up a non profit organisation to promote upcoming hip hop artists around London. now to begin it's the three of us, me, my best friend, and our mutual and very close friend (who is female.) This is the same female who is 30 years old who i have been sleeping with for a couple months.
Now when she suggested we start up this organisation, i was already a bit wary. I want to do it, definitely, but the prospect of conducting regular and consistent business with someone im sleeping with.. did not appeal to me.

Everythings going fine, we have our first recording session next month to take cameras and video to a gig in central London and record everything that happens, we will be interviewing artists and featuring them on our website, blah blah blah.
Now around this time last month, maybe a few weeks ago, I gave this girl the first orgasm she'd had in a long time. She is 30, so i dont know how long she means when she says that, but that's what she said.
And since then, she has started acting like such a fucking psycho. I mean a PROPER psycho.

The other day we went for one of our usual drives into central london, to eat some food, go shopping, she pops into her cleaning company building to sort out some admin, whatever. We ended up arguing all the way home and i dont even know what we were arguing about. she has just started taking whatever i say and whatever i do and turning it into the worst possible version, and throwing it back at me.
Or she will be completely fine to my face, and i'll think 'oh thank god maybe shes back to normal'
then as soon as she gets home she sends me these huge convoluted facebook messages explaining why she wasnt happy with whatever id been doing that particular day, despite smiling and kissing me and offering me spliffs the entire time.

I cant handle this shit. i wish id never slept with her. i want this business to get off the ground and start running properly, start promoting new artists and associating with established acts. i want all this to happen, while i'm still doing a completely unrelated course at university, while i'm writing a novel, while i'm trying to write my own music. i can just about juggle all these things together, but what i cant do is constantly have my business partner and co-founder be fucking INSANE.
the other day she even asked me if she had turned psycho since i gave her that orgasm. i answered yes, and she laughed like it was nothing. and she continues to act the same towards me.
i wouldve thought, if a woman hadnt had an orgasm in 'a long time', once she finally had one itd just relax her even more and stop her caring so much about shit. like getting really high, or something.

but no, apparantly it makes you absolutely crazy, causes you to defy all logic, become a hypocrite, and generally a bit of a bitch.